Top 10 Signs You are Married to a Hoarder

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1 – He returns home from the dump with more stuff than he took…(seriously this has happened on several occasions).

2 – He gets giddy when passing the organizational section at Walmart.

3 – He has duplicate items of everything “just incase” he ever needs it.

4 – Everything…I mean everything he owns automatically has sentimental value regardless of the item.

5 – He generously helps others by taking stuff off of their hands.

6 – He has enough knick knacks to start his own antique shop.

7 – When he tells you about an old friend that weirdly saved belly button lint and you start to wonder if he is considering doing the same thing himself.

8 – He refers to himself as a collector

9 – He finds uses for everything. . old yogurt containers, cardboard boxes, etc. You get the idea.

10 – When he owns 17 backpacks and still can’t wait to buy more each year.

Recently Rob posted “Top 10 Signs You are Married to a Minimalist“. I was not thrilled about this post and suggested he change some points and get rid of others altogether. He called me out on that…even as he was writing a post about minimalism, I was trying to convince him to get rid of stuff:)

Hoarders and minimalists, please feel free to comment below with those signs that may be missing. I know this will be difficult for the minimalists. You are thinking, a list of 10 items is sufficient. What is funny, is I bet the hoarders will be the ones that add to the list.

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Top 10 Signs You are Married to a Minimalist

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1 – You feel the need to search the garbage can before the garbage truck arrives to verify that she has not thrown out anything of value

2 – She values experiences over material possessions

3 – When the folks at the donation drop-off center know her by name

4 – She spends less time organizing and more time connecting

5 – When you buy her flowers and she is counting down the days to when she can toss them

6 – When in comparison, you feel like a hoarder, although you are not.

7 – When suggesting that she pick out a book for you to read, she chooses “The Power of Less” by Leo Babauta

8 – She hesitates to marry you because your last name is not as minimal as it could be. In my case she insists there is some redundancy there… (Bruderer)

9 – She has fewer pairs of shoes than you do

10 – You designate “safe” zones in the house, like a closet, a room, or the garage where you can keep things without fear of it being discarded

Let’s say there is a spectrum where the minimalist that lives out in the forest eating leaves to survive is on one end. All the way on the other side of the spectrum is that person who can’t throw away anything and dead cats are found among their stash.

I’d have to sadly admit that I am probably closer to the hoarder than the minimalist.

Kari compliments me well. She helps me part with things I don’t need, nor will I ever need. There is a refreshing feeling to parting with junk. I recommend all to try it.

If I am missing any of the signs, please comment below. Also please stay tuned. Kari is going to be posting the top 10 signs you are married to a hoarder in response to this.

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